Resolutions Worth Resolving

If you follow my facebook, which I doubt any of you do, I proposed something slightly more manageable this year in terms of personal betterment: to play more games.

Specifically I said video games, but as this year (nearly 1/6 over already) has progressed I started to see another passion, equally worthy of my time. When I made the statement, I was pretty heavily playing Dragon Age. Addicted, you might say, like Elven crack... which may or may not be your thing. Apparently it is mine, however, since despite my best efforts with the dorky-but-attractive (as attractive as digital characters can be) warrior Alistair,

the only man-on-man action my Mage can muster is with Zevran, Elven assassin extrodinaire.

In fact Zevran was so ready to sleep with me, my propositioning him before introductions had even cooled, met with complete success. And earned me a game trophy for being an Easy Lover. Seriously.

Anyway, I wanted to play more which was the point. And since there's more coming which will surely demand my attention, namely Final Fantasy XIII, I think it's safe to say I'll have plenty to play in the upcoming months. If I have any time to play anything, that is.

So video games aside, I have been enjoying a new phenomenon lately: the joys of social-dorkdom in the form of Talisman, a fantasy adventure board game. Actually this is an old guilty pleasure, one I first played at a friend's house with all his brothers at age 9 or so. Being an avid reader, particularly of fantasy, I was completely captivated by the character building and questing of this game. I even went home an tried to create my own game of a similar variety (read: pretty much copied it in a very poorly drawn and cheap way on yellowing computer paper).

I've always loved board games. They can be great entertainment and a fun mental exercise every once in a while, although my family flatly refuses to play Monopoly with me anymore after I continually kicked all their Get-outta-jail-free trash. They're just bitter. When we were young, Amy and I searched for 13 Dead End Drive when we acquired some Christmas gift money, an odd game where you moved other players into physical death traps, like a chandelier that collapses on their piece. It was sort of morbid but we loved it.



Much later I was introduced by my friend Jennie to the thrills of Settlers of Catan in Colorado, a game that saw me through many of my mission office evenings and P-days, and continues to be a fun, and often stressful experience. I don't mind war games, Game of Thrones being my favorite, as it takes the fun of Risk and makes it manageable. Because honestly, who needs a two hour turn? By then everyone else has checked ou of the game.

The point is, I love games. And that first experience with Talisman was no exception. When I was old enough to be making my own money, I searched desperately for a copy, the game now on it's 3rd edition was practically out of print. I even managed to find one remnant, priced completely out of my range. I gave up and let Talisman go to rest, figuring I'd never play it again.

To make a long and boring story short, the game was re-released, in a random but exciting event, changing hands from its parent company a couple times before landing with Fantasy Flight Games, who've done an excellent job. Not only does the game look great, but they continue to support it with expansions. And best of all, I have people who will play it with me! (Some begrudgingly, I suspect, but play it all the same; for which I am grateful)

Game nights happen fairly frequently these days, and it is always a good time; I love what the different personalities bring to the table (believe me, it makes all the difference), coupled with snacks, a ridiculous soundtrack (don't make fun, you know you want to play board games to Gregorian Monks chanting "Losing My Religion"), and plenty of unhealthy food and alcoholic bevs. Talisman is suited to this social engagement as there is some strategy needed, but so much depends on chance and other players. If my love of promoting this game weren't enough, consider then that I, too, remade the Timescape Expansion for this game. It was a bizarre expansion released to help promote some of Game Workshop's (then the owners) other games, and took Talisman to a whole new inter-dimensional level. It was also dangerous, and completely fun. For "Super Talisman Bowl Sunday," as Capree called it, I worked to resurrect Timescape, and would say I did so quite successfully. Alas I have no pictures to share, but I'll take some next time.

Finally, since I know this post has been utterly self-indulgent, I will close with two thoughts. 1) All of my Talisman buddies should be excited... There is a new expansion being released this spring: The Highland!! Make yourselves comfortable, cuz we be playing again soon.



And 2) If you're sad about how long it sometimes takes us to play through a game of Talisman with all these expansions, consider these people. They play a game they refer to as "MegaTalisman," using a unique point system for visiting other boards, they use all expansions and a great number of home brew expansions. The game is capped at about 12-15 hours.



See? We're not so bad.

Resurrection Pending...

And on the 3rd day, they went unto the tomb, only to discover that He did survive.

An Open Letter to Gwen Stefani

Dear Gwen,

I noticed you haven't been in the studio recently and I am concerned.
When are you going to release another album so you can go on tour and
I can come see you in concert? Please rectify this situation
immediately. Thank you.

Peter

Last Seen at Sundance

I've been going to Sundance again this year. It's usually my favorite time too; Seeing nouveau cinema, with a fresher perspective (if not the renegade affair they like to pretend it is - the irony of one of the largest and most commercial film festivals saddling the theme of "Rebel" is inescapable). This year has, so far, proven a mixed bag of films. From the outright psychedelic and terrifying Pepperminta (highly recommended if you've ever craved watching someone menstruate into a silver chalice then feed it to friends), the underwhelming New Low (it would seem that in order to write a character who is witty and wry, the writer himself ought to be witty and wry) or the interesting, if uneven Taqwacores (did anyone even realize there was a Muslim punk scene?), this hasn't been a typical year of high quality for me. That judgement is premature as I still have seven more films to go, but even so, I don't regret seeing movies. Virtually ever, in fact. The only film I think I desperately wanted out of was The Wedding Planner, but that's likely because I had no one who would mock it with me. I don't mind terrible movies, and there's always something gained by the experience, good or bad.

No, the movies aren't my beef this year. It's the people.

Sure, it's always been like this, and perhaps I'm just taking it to heart this time round. But there are a load of toolbags everywhere I turn. All with their stupid parka coats, stupid unkempt - in an "artsy" sort of way - appearance, and hauling their livelihood around like one of the Pioneer Park homeless, in a stupid backpack. God, the backpacks. The appearance is annoying enough, like they're setting out for a hike to Mt. Everest base camp, not sit in a theater for a couple hours. Not just annoying when you trip over them, carelessly thrown in the aisles of a restaurant, it smacks of yuppie, and has come to symbolize for me the crowd of people who attend this festival not for the films, but for the event that it is. It's the same plague that afflicts all the locals who, upon learning you "went to Sundance," inquire as to who you saw. For some, this is less a place of new ideas in a relatively young art form, and more a celebrity press event. A place to be seen, or if you're not famous enough to be seen, a place to be seen with those who are.

I sit in theaters, looking at high maintenance women who are hoping they'll see some cliché romantic comedy, or if it has to be a drama, a touching Titanic-esque piece. There's the attention craving homos who are desperate to be a part of a connected, affluent and edgy world, be it by means of bragging rights or keeping themselves clothed in Gucci with a well placed blow job. There's the grungy types, who work extremely hard to cultivate their counter-culture look and attitude, who have to show up at these things if they're going to continue their "check-out-how-stylishly-I-give-'the man'-the-middle-finger" hipness. And there are more, oh so many more. These aren't people who look for alterations in cinematic narrative, editing convention, or experimental camerawork. They're really there to party and talk up the exclusivity to their friends. If they have to see a few movies to make themselves seem special and part of something, so be it.

Maybe I'm jaded. And perhaps I am, as with each passing year I seem to find a deeper well of cynicism with which to approach life. I'm just tired of the facades that flock to something that ought to offer unconventional perspectives taking stabs at truth. I also realize that maybe I'm no better. I sit in judgement, but perhaps I'm just one more toolbag, of the imperious variety.

Sundance is hardly alone in its attraction to people of the "reality tv" generation. This is an age where we've been fed on shows that teach anyone can be a celebrity, American royalty. Unlike the antiquated British system of blood lines, these days all it takes is gold-digging for a rose from some bachelor, a well placed youtube video, a bitchy housewife in Atlanta, or a "leaked" sex tape. You don't have to actually have talent or connections, except maybe to the internet. Everyone wants to be rich, everyone wants to be famous, and now that it seems so attainable, we're all the more desperate for others to think we are. Truly this is the land where dreams come true. And sometimes I don't think there's any low to which people won't stoop to achieve them.

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WTF?  Only in Idaho. 

Hap-hap-happiest Time of the Year

So Christmas came. And it went. I don't know how a year managed to
wrangle past so quickly, but here we are nearly at 2010. Which, by
all accounts will be a good year. What more can you say about the
release year of FF XIII? Anyway...

Let's recap 2009 for everyone who lived through it (and thus doesn't
need a recap):

•We got a new president. Which just went to prove that our nation is
still both racist and socially unprogressive. But that's the way Jesus
wants it.

•We are living through history. I think most of the events of the
last few years have really just been a sign of the end of American
Imperialism. Our "empire" is in decline, and frankly that's okay. I
mean hell, it worked out for the Brits right? Someday textbooks will
say this. Maybe not American textbooks, but textbooks somewhere. This
decline is most likely due to homosexuals destroying marriage/family
values, our failure to continue torturing other (non-American) human
beings and liberals advocating a universal right to healthcare. It
certainly wouldn't involve our moral superiority complex and divine-
right approach to international relations or capitalist greed in our
financial sector. Luckily our educational system is broken, so more
parents can keep their children home-schooled and away from Satanist
teachings like evolution and global warming. After all, science has no
place in the Lord's Nation.

•For you locals, we learned that the LDS church is akin to the
southern blacks during the civil rights movement, according to Dallin
H. Oaks. This is because the Church is being persecuted for helping
to deny equal rights to another group of people. Just like the
southern blacks were lynched and hung because they didn't want
Mexicans to be allowed to marry. Just like that.

•We discovered that swine flu is way worse than bird flu and we'll
all probably be dead from it soon enough. My school gave us this
advice: Don't go to the doctor if you get sick. We don't want to
overwhelm them. Also, if you're near the U when the flu turns this
country into Zombieland, it is worth knowing that the university
tennis courts have been designated as "The Morgue." Seriously.

• 2009 also took Michael Jackson from us. It was a difficult blow for
many people who didn't know him. And for those few who did. And for
those who sent their kids to his ranch.

•While we're on the subject of celebrities, Tiger Woods cheated on
his wife. Does anyone care? The Media does. And thank god because how
else would we get all the sordid details of the events that normal,
rational people don't give a shit about? Thankfully there are millions
of people who would rather hear about Tiger's marital problems than
all the real news going on. Wait, we're still in a war? Since when?

•Lastly, NASA discovered that there is likely water on the moon. I
could make some comment about our future possibilities for polluting
it, but that's just preachy so I'll simply say: yep. There's water on
the moon.

And there, dear friends, is a biased and useless recap of 2009.
Hopefully 2010 brings you joy, advancement and scads more scandals of
every type. Happy soon-to-be-new year!

How many resurrections does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Okay, the title doesn't make any sense. Nor will the rest of this post. But I have seen a pattern here in my blogging; it functions very much like a wave pattern: periods of heightened activity and interspersed with dropping off the face of the planet.

I apologize for this. I should be more regular. Which is why I'm shooting for a high-fiber diet. But I should also write more often.

The show which consumed my life has come to an abrupt end, and I will post pictures... once I get them. But this should leave me with more time. Theoretically. In reality all I've been left with is a bit of creative satisfaction, an overpowering urge to drink wine with friends, and the urge to play video games.

For right now, that's enough. Hopefully I'll have more luck in the future waxing philosophically. Or at least cynically. Today, I'm just going to remember how much fun it is to be an 8 foot tall blue tiger with a huge sword and a badass fashion sense (a reference that likely makes sense to almost none of you... your loss).