Rainy Days and Coffee

These are a few of my favorite things.  Right now, I have both.  Not sure where I was going with this.  I'm quickly coming to the realization that if I write everyday I will have to branch out from just my meager insights into the writing process.

Currently my writing process it blocked.  I am stuck in a chapter where I collapsed three later chapters down and moved them to this location.  Except it isn't working and I don't know how to fix it.  So my progress has slowed to a snail's pace.  I'm pushing through it, just slower than I would like.
The rain just turned into snow.

Part of the problem is external and has nothing to do with the chapters.  My anxiety with being unemployed is at an all time high, and yes, I could go grab a quick part-time serving job or its ilk (and probably will have to once my mentality catches up to practicality) but there is a piece of me, digging in his heels and resisting because I feel I should be past this.  I shouldn't be clamoring for shit outta-high-school work.  Going back to something like that makes me feel I haven't progressed in the last 12 years.  Perhaps I haven't.

The huskies are enjoying the snow.

But it isn't simply a matter of pride either.  Going back to a job that is dead end feels like, well, a dead end.  I want to dedicate myself to work that I love doing, work I'm passionate about, that is creative and filled with opportunities to learn new things.  I don't want to job hop for survival anymore, I want to thrive.  That's where I want to take my writing.  A career in writing is a long term solution, I'm afraid.  Even if by some ungodly miracle the first thing I wrote was immediately picked up and sold (and it won't be), the turn around time is forever, and you have to sell like a rockstar to make enough for living.  None of this is likely.  Perhaps eventually I could have enough back catalogue to make a living, but for now, something else is on the menu for day-to-day minutia.  I just don't know what.

I need more coffee.

Okay, this is plenty of midlife crisis angst (only in midlife crises you get to buy a sports car and I can't afford that), so I'll be done for the day.  Hopefully your path is clear and well lit, friend.

Inspirational quote for today:

“Writing, therefore, is also an act of courage. How much easier is it to lead an unexamined life than to confront yourself on the page? How much easier is it to surrender to materialism or cynicism or to a hundred other ways of life that are, in fact, ways to hide from life and from our fears. When we write, we resist the facile seduction of theses simpler roads. We insist on finding out and declaring the truths that we find, and we dare to out those truths on the page.”  - Jack Heffron